Finally! I’m introducing My Wee Abode AGAIN! And today I’m sharing the who, where, what and why of My Wee Abode 2.0.
THE WHO WHERE WHAT AND WHY OF MY WEE ABODE 2.0
Introducing My Wee Abode AGAIN
If y’all have been following along via the My Wee Abode newsletters and/or perusing the weekly Tuesday Turn About posts, you know something has been brewing.
You also might know that I not only made a major life change this last month, but that My Wee Abode (the actual apartment) has a brand new ‘look’.
Here is just one ‘moving-day’ picture of the new place… I’ll share several throughout this post. They ain’t pretty, but they give you a glimpse into what is to come!
WHO Moved to My Wee Abode 2.0?
Well, it wasn’t just me that moved!
My 82-year-old mama moved from her memory care/assisted living community and now lives in the second bedroom that is now part of My Wee Abode.
Yep, big changes! Keep reading. 🙂
WHERE Did We Move To???
Actually, we moved about 10 minutes up the street (literally, up the street), from the MWA OG. (Look at me getting all cool!)
My Wee Abode is now a 914 sf apartment (still a tiny home, but MUCH larger than the OG) with two bedrooms, two bathrooms, and a rather large balcony area. AND, we have a washer/dry closet! God is good, y’all!
Here’s a peek at the floor plan!
The new My Wee Abode is located in a large 55+ Active Senior Living community. We are still getting settled, so have yet to take advantage of the activities and amenities offered.
So, we are still living in Fountain Valley in Orange County, So Cal. Fountain Valley’s motto is “A Nice Place to Live”, and it really is! We love it here!
WHAT Moved to My Wee Abode 2.0?
I know that sounds kind of silly. “What” moved to My Wee Abode…
However, you might be surprised by the difference in WHAT you move from a 400 square foot loft apartment to a 900+ square foot apartment.
First , What Didn’t Go… the Purge
While I packed, I purged! What I didn’t take were two large boxes of farmhouse decor items. Some I made and others I purchased.
The two boxes were taken to church and offered to my church family, and then the rest of the items were ‘donated’.
Also, I didn’t take the new oval medicine cabinet or the new chrome faucet I installed in my Modern Coastal Bathroom Makeover. Unfortunately, there is no place for the medicine cabinet to go at the new MWA. And the faucet was just not worth uninstalling and reinstalling. 🙂 (But, my ‘new’ bathroom could sure use a pretty new faucet, just sayin’. LOL!)
And More “Donations”
The new light fixture DID get taken down from MWA 1.0… and given to my sister who will use it in her bathroom. (I’ll explain in another post why I didn’t take it to the new place.) I’m so pleased that my sister will be using the lovely light in her bathroom!
More of WHAT Moved…
What actually DID go to the new MWA is all the rest of the ‘innards’ from the original MWA.
Also, my mom’s full bedroom came from the memory care community… which totally fit in her new bedroom. It’s really nice for her to have her dresser, headboard and decor. Plus, she re-inherited a piece of furniture from MWA… Can you guess what it is? Here’s a hint…
WHY Did We Move into My Wee Abode 2.0?
Now, that’s kinda the real question, right?
Why would I opt to give up my lovely little loft apartment that I have put so much time (and money) into, like a recent bathroom update, or an accent wall, or the ‘marble’ counters using contact paper?
And, why would I opt to become my mom’s primary caretaker, when it is a HUGE responsibility and life change (besides the fact that I love her bunches)?
As you read above, my mom (Sherry) has been living in an assisted living/memory care community for the last 1.5 years. Before that, she was living with my sister for about 2 years, and then before that, she was in another assisted living for about 2.5 years. (WAY too many moves for an 82-year-old woman. But in hindsight, it really would have been hard to avoid.)
Mom has been living in memory care for the last several months, and there was just so much that we were not happy with:
- We wanted more one-on-one care, and we have come to understand that you just can’t get that in any AL/MC community.
- The food, no matter what community she was in, was palatable, at best. They ‘woo’ you at your tour with amazing food, and then don’t deliver to the residents. Really sad.
- Mom’s meds were often given incorrectly. Each time she moved, it would take about 6 weeks to ‘train’ the med-techs how to administer her meds. They always wanted written doctor’s orders, but rarely followed them. My sister and I are convinced that AL/MC communities have more problems than need be because the residents are receiving their psych drugs improperly.
- In recent weeks, my mom has had additional major issues that the caretakers were not in tune with. We often would find caretakers sitting in the dining room on their phones, when it would have been helpful for them to be checking the residents.
- One huge issue was Mom was starting to resign herself to ‘whatever’. And my sister and I really don’t want her last years to be spent resigned (content, yes, but not resigned).
- Another huge issue is Mom is starting to have sun-downers. And we really don’t want her to be ‘alone’ when often she was feeling scared during these times. (Super sad.)
- My sister and I were spending WAY too much time advocating. While having Mom living with me offers another set of challenges, we believe advocating is even more EXHAUSTING.
- Among other things, we were promised the world by the marketing people at these communities, and no one delivered. (Mind you, we were at two different communities, both having excellent reputations and charged $$$!) It would have been very helpful if they had been honest, and we would know what to expect from them, and what we needed to do.
My sister and I started talking AND praying about what it would look like for me to become my mom’s primary caregiver, and my sister to become her secondary caregiver.
We talked and sought counsel with people we respected, and had meetings with our brothers, as well at the rest of the extended family.
This is the plan we have put in place:
- As already shared, we are now living in a 2bd/2bath apartment that is costing way less than half of what we were paying at the memory care community. That’s a HUGE savings, y’all!
- After talking with my boss, we decided I would start working part-time. I just can’t work full-time AND take care of my mom. So, I now am working a total of 16 hours/week: 3 days at home, and one day I go into the office. (I have an amazing boss, and these shortened hours come at a good time. His wife will take on anything I can’t accomplish. Thanks, Peg!)
- On Mondays, when I go into the office, my sister (DeeDee) comes to the apartment and spends the day and early evening with my mom, too. I work at the office for 4 hours, and then I have the rest of the time for errands, appointments, or even blogging (the community here has a computer room that is available or I can work at a local restaurant.)
- On Wednesdays, DeeDee stays with Mom again, so I can spend the day with my daughter and grands. Wednesdays have always been “G-day”, and we all felt this was important for everyone to keep this day as priority. My sister stays into the evening on this day, and actually helps my mom get to bed, as well.
- On Thursday evenings, my oldest brother and his fam come and spend the evening with my mom. Again, I can run errands, go to my church small group (every other week), or even meet a friend for coffee on this evening.
- Two Saturdays a month, the siblings trade off taking care of Mom. This gives me two free Saturdays a month!
- My youngest brother is ‘on-call’ to help when I need him, as he also works from home and can work from anywhere (including MWA).
- AND, the adult grandkids are on-call for errand-running. They will be our “Uber-eats” or any other type of pick-up and delivery we may sporadically need.
It Couldn’t Be Much Better
This plan has been in place for about a week now. I took the first week or so to let Mom acclimate to the new place, and just have me here. Although, there were some surprises and my sister stepped-in and covered for me while I ran some errands that were needed, or I forgot about. DeeDee has been amazingly gracious and helpful!
But, don’t you think we have a pretty good plan in place? If all goes as we have mapped-out, this will be a situation that most people don’t have the blessing of with their parents. Again, we have a good and loving heavenly Father!
Well, this post has already been SUPER long. If you’ve gotten this far, thanks for staying with me! 😉
I have LOTS to do in the new My Wee Abode. I’ll be sharing projects and ideas in my next several posts!
Please feel free to ask questions (I’m sure I missed something!), or leave a comment! It makes my day when you do, and I’m an open book! 😉